


Meeting the Parents

by amerasu1013 (amerasu_1013)



Series: This still counts as Masturbation [4]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America (Movies) RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Crack Crossover, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Light Angst, M/M, Meeting the Parents
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-16
Updated: 2015-08-16
Packaged: 2018-04-14 09:45:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4559940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amerasu_1013/pseuds/amerasu1013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Chris meets Seb's parents. As in his Mom and then... whatever the hell Steve and Bucky are. Seb's disapproving Dad and evil twin brother? Chris has no idea, but they're scary.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Meeting the Parents

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. This is what I write when I need a little break from evil!Steve in ["Around the Bend"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4009915/chapters/9009070). You're welcome, brain. :P  
> 2\. Betaed as usual by the wonderful [zilldk](http://archiveofourown.org/users/zilldk), thank you very much, my dear!!  
> 3\. Still not mine. Damn it! Just having some fun while hopefully not offending anyone...

When Chris meets Steve and Bucky it feels like meeting Sebastian’s parents, only a lot more scary. Okay, maybe it doesn’t, because Chris has actually met Seb’s Mom and she was hella scary already, she grabbed his face and stared into his eyes until he started fidgeting and then she told him she expected him to take care of her son. After that she stuffed him full of cake and cocoa and somehow, that was even more scary than if she had yelled at him. But still, meeting Steve and Bucky is… petrifying. Or it would have been, if anyone had actually warned Chris that they were coming, but nobody did, they just kind of ambushed him. Scary.

Steve is… well, he’s Steve and so has the disapproving-Dad-role down pat, one look from him and you want to roll over and stick your head under the couch, because suddenly you remember every single time you did something that was even a little bit out of line and yeah. Chris’ memories are full of small and not so small misdemeanors, so Steve looking at him with those x-ray eyes (wait, wrong comic verse, maybe?) makes him want to… whimper.

And Bucky is like the scariest Mom ever (Urgh. Mom? Big brother? Evil twin? Something that sounds a little less… incestuous because oh God Seb told him some stuff they did together and oh God), smirking and fondling knives and talking about all the ways he could kill someone and make sure the body is never, ever found and by the way, did he mention how he once fed someone to a tank full of Piranhas at the Sydney aquarium? Yeah. Shudder.

Point is: meeting Steve and Bucky is somehow scarily reminiscent of meeting the parents, but even more terrifying. Then there’s the fact that it’s _Steve_ and _Bucky_ (Which by the way is already hella weird, seriously: comic book heroes popping out from Seb’s closet? What is his life?) and that they, well, look like… look like they do. Like him and Seb. Weird? Yes. Scary? Yes. Nerve-wracking? Fuck yes. Especially since Chris really, really wants them to like him.

Not only because they are Steve and Bucky (or Captain America and the Winter Soldier) and Chris maybe kinda sorta possibly maybe really wants them to like him and what he’s been doing with the role (oh God, that sounds so weird) in the movies and oh God, what if Steve thinks he’s doing it wrong? What if he doesn’t like Chris’ take on the part? His _life_? What if he’s _disappointed_? Fuck.

But also because it’s Sebastian, and Sebastian likes them and gets this really fond expression when he talks about them, which makes Chris smile because happy Seb is the best thing ever and also makes him a little jealous, actually, because… well, happy Seb is the best thing ever and he’s maybe kind of thinking that he, Chris, should be the one who _makes_ him happy. Because Sebastian smiles at him when he sees him and gets shy when Chris tells him how great he is (Seriously, Seb is _great_ , so great all words disappear from Chris’ mind when he looks at him and Seb is just so great) and makes him pancakes in the morning and kissing him feels like coming home and his lips taste like candy and Chris is so stupidly in love with him it’s embarrassing.

Okay, Chris needs to stop thinking about this right the fuck now or he’ll go crazy. He’s the luckiest man alive. Maybe he’ll write a sonnet, except that he sucks at poetry, so maybe a limerick. A dirty limerick, because that would make Seb blush and smile and yeah, Seb is just great. And even with them still sort of figuring things out (Are they boyfriends yet? Chris would like to be boyfriends, or life-partners or lovers or just – well, all of them sound really nice…) Chris already knows he’s in it for the long haul and maybe, probably, hopefully Seb thinks the same.

Which is why it’s so important that Steve and Bucky like Chris, because what if they don’t? What if they tell Seb he could do better? Hell no. Okay, probably yes, Seb _could_ do better, because Chris gets nervous a lot and puts his foot in his mouth all the time and sometimes he forgets things like birthdays and anniversaries, so maybe Seb _could_ do better. But he shouldn’t, please no, he should stay right here with Chris, please. Because Chris loves him and is _in love with_ him and will do his damned best to make him happy like he deserves it. For the rest of his _life_ if Seb lets him.

So meeting the parents is kind of an important step. With Seb’s Mom it went… scary but okay (and the cocoa was great), so hopefully with Steve and Bucky it’ll be okay, too. Chris just needs a little time to prepare for it, ever since Seb told him they wanted to meet him after that photo he sent. It will be fine. Totally fine. He can do this, easy. He can make a good impression.

Or he could have, if anybody had actually bothered to warn him before he one day walks into Seb’s apartment (He has a key! Sebastian gave him a key! This is not just friendship and casual hook-ups for these past few weeks, this is him having a key to Seb’s place!) and finds his own face staring at him from the couch. Well, not his own face, Steve Roger’s face, _Captain America’s_ face and it’s not like he didn’t believe Seb when he told him (he _did_!), but there’s a difference between believing your… your Seb when he tells you he met your alternate Marvel selves and actually, really, properly seeing Captain America standing right there. Which he is, getting up from the sofa and walking towards him and then he’s standing there. Captain America stands there, strong and tall and imposing. Chris flinches and drops the keys (the ones Sebastian gave him!) from suddenly-weak fingers.

“Christopher.” Captain America says and instantly Chris is taken back to oh so many days of his childhood, when he did something stupid and disappointed his mother. The full name only emerged when Chris was in trouble, oh God, is Captain America disappointed in him?!

“Yessir.” Chris mumbles and wants to hide behind something. Seb for example, Seb would be good for hiding behind, but Seb is not here.

“Christopher, I wanted to talk to you about… certain things. About Sebastian. Sit down on the couch, please.”

Oh God. Is this a shovel talk? It must be a shovel talk. And Captain America brandishes one hell of a shovel, a righteous, imposing, scary, intense, super-soldiery shovel. Oh God. Of course Chris can’t _not_ obey Captain America’s (oh God) orders and so he sits down, hoping the couch will just swallow him whole. He’s not usually this meek or shy, but it’s Sebastian and Captain fucking America and Chris really, really wants Captain America to like him.

“Now, Christopher. I realize that this is… slightly unorthodox, but I need you to tell me about your… intentions with Sebastian. I’ve become quite fond of him, as I’m sure you’re aware, and I want him to be happy. So, Christopher. What is it you’re doing with him?”

Well, fuck. Straight to the point, apparently. No small-talk or buildup (maybe that’s a good thing, what kind of small-talk would you make with Captain America? You can’t just talk about the weather with _Captain America_ , can you?!), but straight to the point. ‘What is it you’re doing with him’. Shit. Chris better have a good answer for that. Problem is… he doesn’t really have one. Because…

… because he actually doesn’t know. They’ve been… together for a few weeks now and Seb gave him a key for his apartment. So maybe they are boyfriends? Maybe not partners yet, but boyfriends? Chris would like that. But he doesn’t know, isn’t sure what he’s doing and where they are going with this… relationship and if Seb wants Chris the way Chris wants him. He likes waking up with Seb in bed in the morning and he has the cutest bed-hair by the way and Chris wants to continue waking up with him and fall asleep with him and watch stupid comedies on tv in the evenings. He wants to bake him pancakes, even if Seb’s are way better and he wants to see him smile all the time, because seriously, Seb’s smiles are awesome. Chris wants him to smile all the time, because he just wants Seb to be happy.

He tells Captain America that. Captain America doesn’t look impressed. And then he _says_ he isn’t impressed. Chris takes a deep breath, feeling a little dizzy, and says: “You know, I really wanted you to like me because Seb likes you and I wanted to make a good impression. But you know what? I don’t care anymore, you may be _fond_ of him or whatever, but I fucking _love_ him and so you can just fuck off!”

Then Chris punches him. Right in the face.

Then he has a panic attack, because oh God, he just punched someone, right in the face, he punched _Captain fucking America_ , and if Captain America doesn’t kill him for that (or Bucky or, oh God, _Sebastian_ ), Chris will gladly kill himself, _fuck_.

Chris puts his head between his knees, curling up around his aching chest, gasping for breath and fuck, this is so fucking bad… Captain America says his name tentatively, one big hand coming to rest on his back and it’s warm and nice and that makes it a little better but he still can’t breathe properly, he needs something else, something –

Which is when Sebastian arrives, wraps himself around Chris like a pissed-off, protective blanket (he’s, like, really limber. And angry. And awesome.) and helps him breathe and yells at Captain America (calls him Steve, even, and Seb is the bravest person Chris knows) and kisses Chris and yells at them both and somehow, suddenly, it’s all okay. Captain America – Steve – says he’s sorry and Chris says he’s sorry and then Seb says he’s sorry (For what? He doesn’t have to be sorry, he’s the best thing that ever happened to Chris, and he blushes when Chris tells him that) and then they have dinner.

Steve is actually really nice, as it turns out, and when his nose has stopped bleeding he asks Chris all these questions about the movies, very fascinated by things like CGI effects and stunt doubles and especially interested in how they made Chris look like skinny Steve in ‘First Avenger’. It’s only a little weird when they talk about that stuff (stuff Chris sees as a movie role – or did, until now – but stuff that is actually, well, Steve’s _life_!), mostly it’s awesome. And Steve totally promises to help with the third Cap movie (which apparently has become an alternate universe now, because Steve’s and Bucky’s reunion didn’t happen like it did in the script, and does that mean that there are more universes with more Steves and Buckys running around? It boggles the mind…) and Seb smiles a lot and it’s really great.

After dinner they see Steve off at the closet and he stares deep into Chris’ eyes for a long while (oh God, like Seb’s _Mom_ , oh God), but then he smiles and hugs him and tells him he’s really happy for them both. Sebastian gets the next hug and Chris is mostly relieved and only a little jealous when he watches it. Steve leaves with another smile and a wave; then it’s just Chris and Seb.

They look at each other for a while. Then, right before the silence becomes awkward, Chris blurts: “Do you want to be boyfriends?” Not partners yet, but later? Hopefully? Boyfriends would be nice for now?

Sebastian looks at him. “I thought,” he says carefully, “we already were? Did I get that wrong?”

Oh. Oh! “No! No, not at all. Boyfriends. Yes. Also I maybe love you? Kind of? Like, a lot?”

Sebastian smiles, bright and radiant. Chris is a little awed: that smile is _sunshine_. “I maybe kind of love you a lot, too.”

Chris beams. Seb is seriously _great_. Which is why Chris wraps his arms around him and gives him a very thorough kiss, just to make sure he knows it. It’s still a little scary, thinking about meeting Bucky. But it went fine with Seb’s Mom and with Steve as well (eventually), so Chris thinks meeting Bucky will be fine too. And when Seb smiles at him and pulls him back into another kiss, Chris _knows_ it. Meeting the parents? Suddenly not scary at all. They are boyfriends and in love. They’ll be alright.

**Author's Note:**

> And yes, Chris will meet Bucky too, of course. Soooooon. *cackles*


End file.
